Disappointment riddled across her face
All her dreams and hopes coming out wrong
She felt like the loser in an easy race
And nobody was with her to help
It was night in town that fall
She had just come back from another loss of hope
She sat on her bed, she felt so small
She wished she knew what made her go on
She found no joy and was newly numb again
then the pain began in her heart
She was used to this type of hurt
She wanted to tell someone, but didn't know how to start
She fell over on her bed and
tears flowed from her eyes
She looked down at her pillow red
And thought back to what everyone had said, the lies
The tears that streamed were not clear or black
but crimson as though she had been attacked
And she had, she had inside
the people she loved the most, those who had lied
They broke her heart
tore her apart
She had nobody left and nowhere to go
She cried her blood in an endless flow
Until she finally died.
NeedyIt sits there inside of me
That which I know too well
An animal, a cat
This cat that lives inside me
always needs to be around people
But wants her privacy
She likes to sit in the sun
And eat delicious meals
And she likes to be petted
Petted, scratched, loved.
She can never get enough of
Any form of affection given to her
She'll meow at doors and scratch woodwork
Just so she can have someone come and get her
She hates to be alone.
This cat that lives inside me.
RegretShe lay in the dark and cried,
the demon sitting by her side.
She could not replace
in her head, a face,
to that which she had readily lied.
SoapShe cursed at them.
The second I heard it I hid.
I cowered with my blue patterned blanket
on the old brown couch
My mother's eyes, alight with fear and rage
went into her very own usual emotional cage
My father moved past to the bathroom
grabbed some soap and came
out to the living room
He grabbed the arm of my sister
now scared out of her wits
but I still saw the rebellion in her eyes
Then I watched her get stripped of her pride...
She tried to escape and landed on the floor
The soap was shoved in her mouth
She started crying
Her mouth was foaming
She tried to spit it out
She was left there silently
Convulsing, crying, coughing
I sat by there, staring.
My mother on her computer
glaring at my older sister
I see the red face in my head
the brown frizzy hair mussed up
the soap on the ground coughed up.
And I stayed in my corner on the couch
To think this is how I view my parents.
The Good TimesAt the age of two
When I knew how to walk
I went outside with my mom and dad
and sister who was
running in the grass.
I remember it seemed quite fast.
I was still on concrete
Because of the grass I was scared
When you're young and small
you can see all things that creep and crawl
and sticks that can poke.
But my parents assured me it would be okay
I touched my feet to dirt
Still I was scared
and thinking about
what was not normally thought.
Some definitions for you.1. BRB- to be used only when you'll most likely be gone for less then 15 minutes.
2. BBS- Usually to be used with an explanation as to why you'll be gone. Generally lasts from 10 minutes to an hour unless you said otherwise.
3. BBL- To be used for those instances when you're saying good bye but you may be on at some later point within the day.
4. A few - Three.
5. A couple - Two.
6. Some - More then one, oftentimes more then three.
7. In a sec - Under five minutes.
8. In a min - Under fifteen minutes.
9. Soon - Within the next 45 minutes.
10. Several - 4-10ish
There are some common courtesy definitions for you.
Please use them often correctly.
The outskirtsFuck you all
Don't you see?
I'm no match for society.
Blank minded fools you are
Typing at your desks or
Sagging your jeans
All in the name of this life you believe to be yours
but you don't even own your own dna
Huh? What's that? Nonsense You Say.
I don't want to hear your little excuses.
Your fiery bitchy tongues.
You think you're so clever but all you know was spoon fed to you as children.
Hell, what am I saying?
I'm told I only think what I was taught.
And well, I guess in that case I don't think a lot.
I don't follow many trends,
I don't say what is normal.
I'm not normal but I'm not weird enough for anyone.
Fuck you all and your society that
only accepts those that normal
and those that are way off chart.
I'm sorry, but my fitting in was a piece of art
but survival doesn't earn you friends.
In the end.