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EmpathyWhen someone is up, on top of the world,
It doesn't mean they've never lain lonely and curled.
Surely if that weren't a piece of them,
They would stop looking for each person's gem.
If they hadn't experienced pain near and far,
They wouldn't be quite the person they are.
And they wouldn't stop to wipe your tears
And they wouldn't care about all your fears.
Because empathy is not something you are born with
It is something you've earned.
HalvedMy blogger is filled with half-written posts, my mind is filled with half-written stories, my sketchbook is full of drawings half-assed and my room is a half cleaned flurry.
Wings Part EightMelissa went towards the area it had just come from. She began to hear the sound of rushing water. A few steps later and she was able to see what looked to be a mini waterfall. She started running. She was so excited that she had finally managed to find it!
When she looked around she didn’t see anybody. Disappointed, Melissa grabbed out her water bottle to fill it. She dipped it into the fresh spring and looked up at the sky. It seemed like there was a giant bird landing many feet away.
She closed her water bottle and took a sip. She closed her eyes and tried to figure out what to do next.
“Melissa?” called a voice not too far away.
Melissa looked up only to see what looked like a winged girl many feet away. “Becca?” She called out. The two of them ran towards each other.
“I’ve missed you so much!” Becca said.
“Why did you stop talking to me?” Melissa asked.
“I was growing my wings,” Becca replied, “I ran alm
Wings Part SevenShe wandered forward still. She didn’t have much else to do besides wander on. By midday her feet had started to ache. She found a tree to sit in and took out some food. She ate it slowly, savoring the flavors. She didn’t often savor her food. It was easier when one didn’t know when their next meal would be.
She lounged there for a while before dropping down and trudging on ahead.
She began to pass many, many trees. She was going into a very deep forest. The leaves almost covered up the entirety of the sky, blocking out most of the sunlight. It was beautiful. In a mile she stopped again and decided to set up a pseudo camp.
She gathered brush and pine needles together, putting the softer leaves on top. She made a bed out of it. She laid back and ate her packed dinner.
She found a fallen branch with the leaves still on it and brought it over to where her bed was. She would be using it as a blanket. She dug a hole in the ground and took out her book of matches, striking
Wings Part SixHer mom drove her home after everything had been figured out. She had a new appointment set for next week. Her mom told her she could spend the day at home. Melissa said nothing. She felt residual effects from whatever had happened to her.
Her mom dropped her off at home while she went off to get some allergy medications. The doctors thought Melissa had an allergic reaction to the gas. Melissa knew differently. No. The trouble was not an allergy. The trouble was that they wanted to take away a part of her. The knobs were important.
She didn’t know why or how, but she knew they were.
She looked around her room after she had climbed up the stairs. It was clean. Organized. Normal.
She didn’t want it anymore. She didn’t want any of this anymore. She wanted freedom. She wanted to be whomever she was now, whatever that looked like.
She spotted her backpack on top of the bed. It was open, papers strewn from the zipper. She emptied it and began packing. She packed things that
Wings Part FiveIt was now Wednesday morning. They wanted to put her in for surgery that upcoming Monday. She didn’t know if she was ready. She had become fond of the growths. She decided to continue without the hoodie for the rest of the week for the sake of it being the last days with her knobs.
People would find it strange if they asked her why she wasn’t ashamed or scared of them, but she didn’t care. It’s not like she had a whole lot of school friends anyways.
Her best friend had stopped talking to her this year anyways.
Her other “friends” rarely talked to her, too. It was as though she had an invisible disease. Sure, she had become quieter, but why was that a problem? It shouldn’t have been. Real friends don’t abandon others for being quiet. For missing school. For losing other friends.
Melissa tried not to cry as she got ready for school. She wanted to transfer, but she knew if she told her mom this, she would suspect it was because of the bumps.
Wings Part FourShe spent the rest of that night working on making the wings as gentle and attractive as she had imagined in her mind.
After she finished, she changed into her pajamas, opened the window, and tucked herself deep within her quilt for sleep.
She was small, standing next to the flower. She was about twice the size, making her about a foot tall. Her hair had turned a bright blonde color and her eyes and dark green. Her wings were half the size of her body. They were beautiful and they were delicate. They resembled the fairy that she had drawn not more than an hour before, except she was in color.
The wings were a soft yellow with black dots and orange rims. They were thinner and more defined than that of a butterfly. And they were great for flying.
She effortlessly lifted herself into the air, fluttering her wings about. Little sparkles drifted down with every wing flap, there seemed to be no end to it. It was so pretty, being able to see those sparkled in the light of day.
She found herse
Wings Part ThreeHer alarm chose that moment to go off. She covered her ears and moved towards the alarm, shutting it off with her elbow. Her back felt really weird. The bumps had grown. They stuck out an inch and a half from her shoulder blades. They were hard and firm. It was as though she was growing an extra pair of arms from her back.
She groaned and sat on her bed, her head in her hands. Half an hour later her mom knocked on her door. “We don’t want to be late for your appointment,” she said, “Come down and grab some breakfast!”
Melissa removed her hands from her head, she felt a little better. “Coming.”
She changed into her favorite pair of jeans and threw a tank top on under her enormous hoodie. She didn’t want people in the waiting room to think she was a freak. She wandered downstairs to find that her mom had made homemade blueberry pancakes. She must have remembered how much Melissa hated doctor’s visits.
Melissa scarfed down the pancakes
Wings Part TwoMelissa made sure to open her window tonight. She hoped there wouldn’t be any large breezes this time. Or if there was, that it would yet again save her from hawk talons.
She snuggled under the blankets and closed her eyes. She was soon asleep.
It was raining. The droplets were hitting her feathers with a lot more force than if it were just sprinkling. No, this was a storm. She was in the air. Her bill made it hard to see down and in front. She tried to ignore it. She was looking for somewhere to land but all she could see was churning water.
She was over some kind of body of water. An ocean? It seemed to be much too large for a lake.
Little crests of white peaked the tips of waves. It would be beautiful if it weren’t so threatening. The noise was deafening, terrifying.
Luckily for the duck, its feathers were coated in a natural oil, making it so the water didn’t soak into the downy softness hidden underneath. She was glad she had remembered to preen. If she hadn
You're worth so much moreShe was the type
to cut her wrists,
and then swallow the
because looking at what
was even harder
but I want to tell her
to let the emotions
p i l
out of her mouth,
instead of her
and that I'll gladly
let the words slice me,
if it means
I Tear My Skin AwayI Tear My Skin Away
I tear this skin from my body,
Even if the world screams,
That I am only an illusion.
I tear the bones from my legs,
Through pain, I will grow,
Through suffering, I will become.
I rip the muscles from my arms,
These teeth from my jaws...
And with nothing upon me,
I carry on...
Like a broken puppet, still shivering,
Still forcing its way through the darkness;
I tremble for I am nothing...
And yet, I am moving. My voice still screams...
I draw breath into these tired lungs,
As I rip the flesh away...
And I shatter these mirrors before me,
With a voice that will not break:
Because the world cannot label me as nothing,
And I will live for my own sake!
"So tell me, is that all the pain you've got for me?"
You're beautifulPlease eat.
Are you listening to me?
If you are,
I want to tell you.
You re beautiful.
It doesn't matter what you weigh,
you shouldn't feel guilty about what you ate.
It doesn't matter,
I promise you things will get better.
Listen to my words,
Hold my hand.
Don't worry about the rest of the world,
It's okay if they don't understand,
How it feels like,
To feel fat,
To feel ugly,
To feel worthless.
You are none of those things.
It s okay to be chubby,
It s okay to be skinny.
Because you have a big heart.
And your smile,
Is like a priceless work of art.
And I don't want to see you destroy,
Because you're more than just a broken toy.
And to everyone else,
So for once let yourself be,
Accept your reflection.
Because you are the definition of perfection.
So don't worry,
Don't be sorry,
To be who you are.
Because you re,
Those Green Eyes (Or: Don't Lie to Your Kid)Those green eyes -
The green of joy
The green of hope
The green of love and acceptance -
Were always full of lies.
They first lied when I said,
After a nightmare at four am
When I was too small to reach a light switch,
“Will you ever leave me?”
And those eyes said,
Why did those green eyes
Shut when I needed them most?
"Are you okay?"
Would be a red line
That I would etch into myself
Those green eyes melted.
Those green eyes did shine
And I knew what it was -
I was young, not stupid -
But I indulged the lie,
For those green eyes.
"Will it get better?"
I asked one sunny Saturday
At ten in the morning
And those green eyes looked away;
“And you’ll be here forever?”
There were no words.
I made up my own affirmative.
Those green eyes -
When they saw
How I’d rubbed myself raw
notes on a matchbook love.if I were the type
to say how I really felt,
I'd tell you that
I hope you choke on your apologies
like they're arsenic
and your nails are already
with the poison.
I'd let you know
that I'll never be a body
for you to touch
just because I know that's all you want.
I'll never be a fairy in a bottle
at your waist.
this is no storybook, and
I am no myth.
hear my silence,
feel the cold absence
respond to your weak "I'm sorry"s.
I beg you,
stop digging the hole,
stop, just stop.
Hush and watch the flames
engulf the image you sold me.
you can tell me
I'm beautiful as much
as you want,
but I know that it's not enough,
that you'll always want more,
that you've been a wolf
between my legs all this time
and my fingers are bruised
from holding the leash.
now every time you whisper
"please be okay",
I will always tell you that
I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.
I will forever pretend
that I've grown up from you,
that I've become a mystery
What is Hope?Hope is something we have as children,
It helps us thrive and try our hardest.
Hope is what we express in the worst of times
When all hope seems lost.
Hope is what people possess in life
To work toward our dreams.
Hope is a lie
That's not worth our time.
AnxietyAnxiety tapping on my door,
"Can I come inside your head?"
I shiver, not ready for its visit.
It charges in, smelling of worry.
Spends a morning, afternoon and night,
playing with my emotions.
A marionette dancing its old tune on rough strings.
Leaves me winded and praying to beat it the next time.
I miss youYou are a ghost in my head
Living, yet you haunt my thoughts today
To speak your name
Would be to desecrate this space
Where you are, I should not care to know
But you are a never-healing wound
An unfulfilled promise
A chance to do no wrong
My memories burn with your taste, your touch, your smell
Who have I become?
Too long have the years been to me
To find myself wishing for the crossroads
For the chance to say no, one more time.
I Know You're Strong, Let's Be Stronger TogetherI Know You're Strong, Let's Be Stronger Together
if i’m being completely honest,
i can’t say i know what you’re goin’ through.
and if i’m being frank,
i’m sort of afraid to write this
because i’ve always been unsure
if i love too much but it’s my nature
and i’d rather lose by trying too hard
than to do so without doing enough.
i hope you’re asleep now
and i hope you don’t read this
till the morning and i hope by then
things will be a little lighter
but i’m hoping against hope
because if you don’t know,
i feel when things are off.
call it intuition, call it a feelin’,
say i just know it.
my friend, my door is always open
even when you’re feeling closed
off to the world and right there,
i can understand that feeling well,
because i still feel we relate to one another
better than most brothers understand their sisters.
know i look at you as a sibling
and i believe we know when the other
I never asked to be aliveThere you went to give me life
And said it was a gift of course
But this gift is a little rough
Okay, to be honest, it's a curse
I was the one that you bestowed this upon
Myself and nobody else
Never did you once seem to think
How this might affect me
Asked by myself every morning
Why it is I'm here today
To only be answered by my thoughts
That you gave me the gift, why should I take it away?
Be a good sport and accept it
Use it in every which way
Alive and well is the goal
But you only gave me the life
IronmanHear me read it
My friends used to call William "Ironman" because the first time we kissed he got a nosebleed and the taste of his blood haunted me for a long time after it. We'd only been twelve years old and apparently the anxiety spiked his blood pressure to the point of combustion... I remember that when we were forced to take sex ed a few years later we were divided into separate classes for boys and girls, in case a diagram of an ovary was too risqué and we became animalistic and started clawing at each other in our seats, but nonetheless when our teacher Ms Jacobs had explained to us what an erection was in my mind all I could picture was the blood rushing to his nose and then the slash of cranberry across my blouse.
With the idea planted in his mind it didn't take long for William's hands to start wandering, but the image persisted. Every time I thought about just letting it happen I wondered what would happen if he got too excite
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More